Review: Season 1 of GLOW

Season 1 of the Netflix Original comedy GLOW wasn’t a total romp. It had plenty of serious moments. The overall impact, however, is one of R rated campy fun and female empowerment via headlocks and body slams. Continue reading “Review: Season 1 of GLOW”

Recap: Lost Girl S4, E3 Lovers. Apart.

Bo (Anna Silk) is back in command of most of the scenes in Lost Girl this episode, but she’s not quite in command of her memory yet. I’m usually the queen of willing suspension of disbelief, but this episode strained even my willingness to gloss over strange plot points. Oh, who cares, Bo is back!

Dyson (Kris Holden-Ried) and Clio (Mia Kirshner) pop into view on the train. Dyson is disoriented and in pain.

Cleo saves Dyson
Clio saves Dyson

Clio explains (exposition is her middle name) that his pain is transcendental in nature because he isn’t an elemental (not because he’s been reading too much Ralph Waldo Emerson). Clio, the elemental, can blow red smoke rings in his ear to save him from trancendentalism.

A strange conductor appears and Dyson asks about Bo. Every time he says the word “Bo” the entire train shakes. And he says Bo a lot! They hear screams. Clio says it’s damsels (damsels?) who are trapped and trying to get out. She says they have to get out of there and find his girl.

Bo runs through the woods
Bo runs through the woods

Bo meanwhile is running through the woods in her white nightgown and Keds. Every succubus wears Keds with her nightgowns, right? She finds a house and goes inside. The furniture is covered with sheets. She hears arguing about what a shit hole this is and that it will only be for one night. A family walks in.

Family time
Family time

They are the Jenkins family, played by Lochlyn Munro, Chloe Rose and Katherine Ashby. Bo stares at them, says “Home?” and the daughter bashes her on the head with an iron skillet. Ouch.

A barefooted woman approaches a man working at a vent. It looks like its full of papers that were hidden there. Is that a wanted poster for Karen Beatie? The woman talks to the man about his piano and how she could have made him a star. Then she touches him and he turns to a puddle of goo. We know who can turn people into stars and/or puddles of goo, don’t we?

Ebony has her own problems.
Evony has her own problems.

She turns to face the camera and we see that Evony (Emmanuelle Vaugier ), the once famous Morrigan, has problems. Getting trapped by Vex behind a painting of yourself apparently isn’t good for your eyes.

At the cafe, Lauren (Zoie Palmer) has reorganized the place, which she explains to Crystal (Ali Liebert) with scientific precision. She asks Crystal if she likes it and Crystal says, “Yeah, I do like.” Of course, she isn’t talking about the sugar and salt placement and whether the vinegar is next to the ketchup. She’s talking about the woman in the bad wig.

I do need some sugar
I do need some sugar

Actually, maybe Crystal does like where the sugar is, because she snakes around Lauren to get it. Lauren says, “Crystal, I can’t,” once again. Methinks she doth protest a lot.

Bo wakes up. The two Jenkins women are staring at her. Bo asks, “Were you on the train? What happened to all the smoke? Does this have something to do with Lauren?” Julia, the daughter, says, “Bitch, I think your brain broke.”

Sounds like Kenzi, does Julia. Bo says, “I am so hungry.” The mother says, “Would you like something to eat?” Bo says, “Please do not ask me that.” The father walks in from hanging a whole line of shoes on the clothesline right outside the window. Hungry Bo looks at his hunkiness. Julia says, “Could you please not look at my Dad like he’s a hot dog.” When the mother tells her to be polite, Bo says, “She reminds me of my friend. It’s comforting.”

Dad says Bo has to go. She asks to use the ladies room and instead wanders all over the house.

Dyson and Clio find Bo’s room on the train. The nurse person tells them Bo’s gone. Dyson and Clio go to the back of the train and find a scrap of the white nightgown. Clio explains that if Bo jumped from the train the transcendental delirium that had affected him could kill her. Well, an elemental could save her. Maybe.

Take a flying leap
Take a flying leap

They hold the scrap of material and leap from the train.

Bo wanders in a basement in the house, finds a room with a metal door that looks like a cell. The Jenkins crew shows up with papa aiming a double barreled shotgun at Bo and generally being in a hurry for her to get going. They say they are protecting Julia from a ghost. Papa explains how they are haunted and on this exact day each year they lock themselves in these cells until morning to escape the ghost. “Dealing with weird shit is kinda what I do,” says Bo. “I can help.”

Papa doesn’t want help. The girl protests that there is no ghost. They explain that you cannot go outside past the shoes.

Bo agrees to leave. Dad locks up Julia.

Kenzi’s favorite Druid, Massimo (Tim Rozon), walks in to Lauren’s old apartment, where a woman is doing Evony’s nails. He says, “All of a sudden you can’t live without me.” Oh, the scene with the vent must have been in Lauren’s apartment, too. I see it now.

Why is Evony living in Lauren’s apartment? Didn’t it belong to the light Fae?

Imperial brown with a slight touch of green near the cornea
Imperial brown with a slight touch of green near the cornea

Evony wants Massimo to grow her eyeball back. And he better do it right. He promises a perfect imperial brown eye with a slight touch of green near the cornea.

Here's Bo!
Here’s Bo!

Bo enters Julia’s cell. Bo’s lock picking skills are definitely returning. She calls Julia “Kenz,” and asks what’s going on.

Julia shows her a scrap book filled with news clippings about Jenkins family members who killed their whole families. Her dad saw his father shoot his entire family. They think a ghost makes them do it. Bo offers to help get her out of there.

Dyson and Clio and in the woods, tracking Bo’s scent. Until Dyson loses it. But, of course, Clio knows where to find Lazy John (Darren Frost).

Have you seen a succubus?
Have you seen a succubus?

Seems Lazy John was buried in the woods by monkeys. (Monkeys? Global warming has forced all the monkeys to move to Canada?) Clio asks if he’s seen a succubus running through the woods. He won’t talk unless he gets what he wants.

Clio knows what he wants. She whips off her shoe and offers to let him suck “just one” of her perfectly manicured toes. No deal, he wants Dyson’s toes. I’m heartbroken to report that we did not get to see Dyson getting his toes sucked by Lazy John. But afterwards, Dyson said, “We won’t ever speak of this,” as they head in the right direction to find Bo.

Bo and Julia are making their escape through the shoes. The shoes are there because the ghost has to try on every pair – slows her down, you see. And you have to walk backwards by the shoes because a ghost can’t jump into you when you’re going backwards. At which point Bo realizes the ghost is a body jumper. Too late, because it jumps into Julia even as Bo figures it out.

Papa with his shotgun thinks he’s going to have to kill Julia because the thing is in her. Bo tries to calm him down. Turns out he was the one who killed his whole family, not his father as he led everyone to believe.

I know what it's like
I know what it’s like

Bo feels for the guy. She knows what it’s like to have something inside you that you can’t control.

Sparks fly from the light fixtures and the fire in the fireplace flares up. Julia rises up and talks in the same kind of strange voice Bo uses when she’s Bo-the-all-powerful. Julia claims to be pure evil. Bo tells mama and papa Jenkins to go hide, and with blue eyes flashing, she faces off with evil Julia.

At the cafe, Crystal brings Lauren a tip. Lauren goes straight to the sexual tension and says, “I’m sorry, I just have a lot on my mind.”

Crystal says, “I get it.” Lauren ask her why she’s there. Crystal explains that she thinks she’s bad luck and that her dreams of being the best singer in the big city were too much. She’s settled for smaller dreams. She shows Lauren an ad for a 10 acre farm, which she wants to buy. Crystal says, “I know you’re not on the market, but if you ever want to grab some pizza and beer and vent, you know where I live.”

I do know your address
I DO know your address

Lauren doesn’t think she knows where Crystal lives, but it seems Crystal put her address in with the tip. Does Lauren like this? Yes, she does.

At the house in the woods, Bo and Julia are tossing each other around the room when Dyson arrives and grabs Julia. This apparently drives the chumby (gumby? jumbie?) body jumper right out of Julia and gives Bo a chance to say hello to Dyson.

I'm so glad to see you
I’m so glad to see you

Their hug fest is interrupted by Clio, who houses the chumby now. She tries to stab Dyson.

Lauren knocks on Crystal’s door. She’s brought beer, pizza and venting.

Crystal just brought herself
Crystal just brought herself

Crystal answers the door in a tank top and undies. Lordy.

They’ve subdued Clio now, so the jumbie jumps back into Julia, who promptly slices open her mother’s throat. Clio offers to get a peony plant to stop the bleeding. Dyson wants Bo to go or she’ll die, but Bo says she’s got it, she can handle it.

Crystal and Lauren are on the floor, leaning on her bed, doing the venting and drinking and eating just like they said they would.

Pizza, beer and what?
Pizza, beer, and what?

Pizza and beer and venting must be a great aphrodisiac because Lauren finally stopped saying I  can’t and switched to yes, yes, yes. Although the experience is vigorous to the max, the red hair stays in place. How can that be?

Dyson and Bo chase Julia into the woods, where Bo heals her by sucking the chi and the chumby out of her.

Stop torturing them
Stop torturing them

Suddenly Bo is in a whole other place, with a woman in old garb – the gumbie? She tells the woman to stop torturing the Jenkins family. The woman shows her reinactments of how she was tortured by the Jenkins family as a witch. How they tried to prove to her fiancé Noah that she was a witch by holding her underwater. This didn’t kill her, not because she is a witch, but because she’s an elemental. Boy, the elementals are taking over the place.

The older Jenkins leveled his double barreled shotgun (same gun?) at the woman and her Noah. He killed them both with a single blast. Then he buried them in two different graves. That’s her problem – the separate graves.

Bo wakes up suddenly. Oh, the whole reinactment in some other place was a dream. Okay. Even so, Bo feels all the anger. The chumby is trying to take over Bo. Dyson urges her to fight.

By the way, Massimo came through. Evony likes the new eye. She kisses him. He says, “What was that?” She says she realizes now she’s been far too nice. She wants to kill the succubus. Massimo says, “She’s gone. I helped Tamsin get rid of her for you.”

With Bo gone, Evony plans to take over everything. Massimo looks a bit concerned with this news.

Bo is still struggling with the gumby anger. She says, “Separate forever.” Clio jumps up and down in excitement. She says, “I know. If we bury them together it will end the gumbies need for vengeance.”

Bo gives Dyson a big kiss, says she can fight the chumby inside her, and sends him off to find the graves. Dyson and Clio find the graves and transfer all the bones into a single grave. Dyson finds wedding rings among the bones. Dyson has wedding rings, therefore, Bo appears.

In sickness and in death.
In sickness and in death.

Dyson puts a ring on Bo, a ring on himself, and recites some marriage vows as if he were Noah about loving her in sickness and in death. She does the same.

This drives the jumbie out of Bo and the ghosts of the two dead lovers do a little happy dance above the graves until they settle together in one. Bo, who is apparently back to herself now, looks at her ring finger, says, “Wait. Are we?” Dyson answers, “Ready to go home.” She says, “Hell yes.”

Lauren walks into Ronny’s Cafe all happy, still chipper about her enthusiastic yes from last night. And damn, what should happen but the phone rings and Ronny says some guy has been calling every 10 minutes asking about a Karen. She keeps walking and heads out the back.

Julia Jenkins, back to her normal Kenzi-clone self, is thanking Bo and offering to share some better fashions than the mud spattered nightgown. Bo gives her a slip of paper with contact information on it. Oh, I hope that means that Chloe Rose will be coming back again. It would be fun to see the real Kenzi and this near-Kenzi crossing verbal swords in the same room!

Lauren goes to Crystal’s and tells her she has to leave town. Crystal wants to come. Lauren says no. Crystal promises not to tell anyone who Lauren is.

Dyson, Bo and Clio and walking down a road in the woods, headed home. Dyson asks Clio to do the ear thing to Bo.

No smoke rings in the ear for Bo
No smoke rings in the ear for Bo

Instead Clio grabs Bo and holds a knife to her throat. She wants to collect money for delivering Bo. This doesn’t go over well with Bo, who is sick of being lied to and double crossed, and who sucks Clio down to a limp mess in the middle of the road. She doesn’t completely drain her, however, because dying with a smile on her face is too good for her. They killed Mia on The L Word, they killed her on Defiance, but our Bo has a heart of gold and she proves it. Mia lives!

Bo and Dyson walk away from Clio and talk about heading home. Later in the car, Bo is leaning on Dyson’s shoulder as he drives. They’re holding hands. She says, “I can’t wait to see everyone. Kenzi. Hale. Trick.” Hmm, isn’t there a name missing from that list? Dyson says, “Someday we’re going to have to talk about what happened on that train.” Bo says, “What train?” Dyson says, “I don’t know.” But Bo will figure out what happened to her one way or another.

Lauren is beside the road, trying to hitch a ride. Who should stop for her but Crystal. Lauren hops in, says, “I’m really happy to see you.” Crystal answers, “I’m really sorry.” Someone appears from the back seat and holds a cloth over Lauren’s nose, knocking her out. Big questions for next week: who was in the back seat and why did Crystal betray Lauren?

Bo and Dyson drive past Crystal’s car stopped on the side of the road. Bo says, “Should we stop?” Dyson says, “Whoever that is can fix their own flat tire.”

Personal Thoughts

  • Welcome back, Bo. We missed you.
  • Bo and Lauren were in the same neck of the woods through this entire episode. So close, yet so far away.
  • Is the illogical crap in the plot lines part of the memory issue afflicting everyone on Lost Girl? Please.
  • Not a word was said about Bo’s father in this episode. Want to bet me that they drag that particular point out to the last episode of season 4?
  • Just when Lauren started trusting that temptress Crystal, we learn she’s sold Lauren out. Man, the worst things happen to Lauren. Plus, this rules out any future horizontal mamboing between Lauren and Crystal, which is a crying shame. Come on, y’all, Bo and Lauren are on a break – Lauren can mambo where she wants. It seems doing the mambo with anyone but Bo results in betrayal, however. Is there some deeper message in that?
  • It would have been nice for Dyson and Clio to take a moment to fill the grave full of reunited bones back in. You know, instead of walking off leaving the grave wide open. That’s like Bette and Tina stumbling off for the bed while leaving the gas on full blast under the stir fry. We worry over these details, dear writers and editors.
  • I hope we haven’t seen the last of Mia Kirshner and Ali Liebert!

Recap: Lost Girl S4, E2 Sleeping Beauty School

Trick (Richard Howland) talks to a photo of Bo. “Please, my darling granddaughter, just tell us. Where are you?” The question on everyone’s mind starts off the episode. Lost Girl still has a lost girl.

Dyson (Kris Holden-Ried) gets off his motorcycle at the spot where Tamsin drove off the cliff. The spot he’s been going to every day in search of Tamsin. He pokes around in the weeds.

Dyson finds this little hellion in the weeds
Dyson finds this little hellion in the weeds

He finds a little spitfire of a girl (Ava Preston). Based on her attitude and her mass of blonde hair, I think she’s a teeny-tiny Valkyrie.

Kenzi surveys the bed
Kenzi surveys the welcome-home love nest

Kenzi (Ksenia Solo) is preparing Bo’s bedroom for a welcome home. She has everything a succubus could want in her love nest: chocolate, lube, the promise of angel quality Victoria Secret models and a perfectly made bed. I like this shot of Kenzi checking out the bed because it has both Mia Kirshner and Ali Liebert listed as guest stars on the same screen.

Dyson asks her what she’s doing, especially since they haven’t found Bo yet. As Kenzi fondles Bo’s kimono, he tells her she needs to come downstairs.

I think she was in the crash.
I think she was in the crash.

Kenzi sees the urchin in the kitchen and says, “Oh, my god, it’s mini-me.” Dyson tells her he thinks she was in the crash. “Valkyries have many lives.” He wants to keep her because she may know something about Bo’s father. Kenzi agrees that they need to go all interrogation on her. The girl tosses a huge knife into the wall with perfect accuracy, says, “Peace out, losers,” and flounces off. Kenzi says, “Tamsin,” and Dyson agrees.

Whatcha doing on the phone, Amber?
Whatcha doing on the phone, Amber?

At Ronny’s Restaurant, Lauren – err, Amber – is cursing a phone call that doesn’t go through. Crystal, another waitress, comes up behind her. It’s everyone’s favorite Bomb Girl, Ali Liebert. She says, “You ever need anything . . . ” as an offer to help the lovely Amber with just about anything. Amber denies needing help and walks off.

Trick is explaining that newly reborn Valkyries don’t always remember everything, which is why they can’t get the info they want out of tiny Tamsin. He says they sometimes suppress memories from the last lifetime.

Trick comments on how insecure the clubhouse is while messing with a crate he brought from the Dal. You know which crate, the one with The Wanderer card in it that nobody has yet noticed contains an image of Bo. Dyson notices cuts on Trick’s arm and Trick explains about a run-in with Aife. Unfortunately, the encounter drove Aife, “back to insanity over the loss of her child.” That’s ambiguous enough to let them do just about anything with Aife in future episodes.

Kenzi still has the compass
Kenzi still has the compass

Trick says to find Bo they need the compass they left behind at Angleworm’s, but Kenzi whips it out and says, “Oh, this bad boy?” Trick checks out the compass and announces that Bo is no longer on this physical plane.

Bo awakens
Bo awakens

Cut to Bo (Anna Silk), who wakes up atop a bed in a white nightgown. She’s in something that’s moving.

Where am I?
Where am I?

Bo peers out a window and sees clouds or smoke flying by. “Shit,” is her reaction.

Dyson and Trick are talking about someone who can traverse the intersecting planes of existence to track Bo. Endymion. He’s been missing for 800 years. The only Fae who might know where the missing Endymion is turns out to be his ex, Selene (Cynthia Preston), who owns a salon. Trick has her address right here in his Fae Rolodex.

Vex is tortured

They hear horrible screams and Trick says it’s the Una Mens. Cut to a dungeon where Vex (Paul Amos) is trussed up like a Thanksgiving turkey and bleeding from almost every square inch of skin. The dungeon master (Christine Horne) want to know where The Morrigan’s body is. Vex says she isn’t dead, she’s missing. They threaten him with a mask. For some reason the mask is really scary and he caves. He asks why he would give them a crazy bitch when he can give them – her. He gestures to a mask.

Which crazy bitch is Vex giving up?
Who is Vex giving up, the human doctor or the unaligned succubus?

The camera pans past masks for the unaligned succubus and the human doctor. Who is Vex selling out now? And what the hell are the scary masks about? They let him go but put some gooey gunk from the dungeon master’s neck in his mouth first.

At Selene’s salon, Dyson and Hale (K.C. Collins)  are looking for Endymion, also known as Eddie, which is much easier to spell, thank you. Selene says he hasn’t been around in ages. She wants to cut Dyson’s curly hair and drags him to the back.

My hat, now.
My hat, now.

Hale tries to break into the salon’s computer, when Clio (Mia Kirshner) shows up, snatches his hat, and says, “What do you want with Eddie? Selene isn’t going to tell you shit. You need to go see Astrid.” She writes something on Hale’s hand as a message to Astrid and disappears, leaving only the hat.

Back at the succubus love nest Kenzi is perfecting, tiny Tamsin is asking a lot of questions. Kenzi gives her a giant lollipop, which was part of the love nest supplies.

Maybe I lack imagination, but I cannot decide how Bo would make use of a giant lollipop during her sexual escapades. I finally decide the lollipop is an homage to The L Word because it looks exactly like the one Jenny, played so well by Mia Kirshner, was licking during Max’s baby shower.

Tiny Tamsin wants to know if Kenzi has a boyfriend and if they make out. Kenzi says men are dumb and love kicks you in the friggin’ box – or whatever. Tiny Tamsin eyes Bo’s night stand and says, “What’s a condom?” Kenzi says everything in Bo’s room is off limits to little Valkyries. The little Valkyrie is bouncing like mad. Kenzi says, “Why are you vibrating? Is that a Valyrie thing?”  Nope, just gotta pee.

Tiny Tamsin tosses Kenzi’s magic sparkle cream that makes her a fake Fae in the toilet. Kenzi demonstrates the gleam, but when Tiny Tamsin wants more she is out of gleam cream.

Getting the scent
Getting the scent

Astrid (Farah Merani), who has no mouth and therefore can’t talk, is talking a blue streak. She’s giving Dyson and Hale advice about their loves lives while she discusses scents. She says Hale needs to learn to hunt (Kenzi, we presume), and puts a drop of scent on him. She gives Dyson a vial she calls “one kiss.”

In the salon, a whole herd of scantily clad beautiful women dance around Dyson and Hale. Every good looking woman in Canada must have been hired for this scene. Suddenly Clio appears. She’s dressed in black slacks with a tucked in white shirt. Compared to the other women in the salon, she looks positively butch. Dyson wants to ask her questions, but she says, “Girls, it’s feeding time and guess who’s coming to dinner.” Dinner is Hale. (Yes, they did make a guess who’s coming to dinner joke about Hale. Boo. Hiss.) All the pretty girls gather around Hale, apparently to smell him. Because, you know, the scent.

The Wanderer
The Wanderer card

Kenzi attempts to make cookies to entertain Tiny Tamsin. Tiny Tamsin finds The Wanderer card. When she touches it, it bursts into flames. Someone finally notices that Bo is on the card. MMXV is also on the card, which Tamsin asks about. She also asks if Kenzi thinks Bo is stuck in the card.

Dyson breaks into a bedroom to find Eddie (Benjamin Ayres).  He’s asleep and Dyson can’t wake him. Selene appears and says Eddie isn’t dead, just fast, fast asleep.

At the restaurant, Lauren – err, Amber – sees a newspaper photo that looks a lot like Bo. She drops all her dishes on the floor. Crystal comes over to help clean up and lets Lauren know that she isn’t fooling anyone with her fake resume that says she’s waited tables before.

You're cute, funny and sexy.
You’re cute, funny and sexy.

Crystal touches Lauren, straightens her hair, pins on her name tag for her and calls her cute, funny and sexy. Oddly, she isn’t put off by the horrid wig. As if that wasn’t enough obvious flirting, Crystal wants to get a drink with Amber/Lauren after work.

The Lauren look
The Lauren look

Amber/Lauren gives Crystal that look, you know, the one where she uses her eyes. The look that says I realize you are incredibly desirable and you are offering yourself to me. Then she says she can’t have a drink after work, she just can’t.

one kiss
One kiss

Back in Eddie’s bedroom, Dyson uses his vial of one kiss to make Selene kiss Eddie and wake him up. She’d rather kiss Dyson, but the stuff in the vial works. Eddie is back with us. First he elbows his wife, calls her a harlot. Then he wants mead and a Turkish bath.

Kenz. I know that name.
Kenz. I know that name.

Bo is locking picking her way out of the railroad car, muttering, “You’re right Kenz, lock picking is a skill everyone should know.” She pauses, “Kenz, I know that name.” What? She doesn’t remember Kenzi? Everyone else remembers. Why doesn’t Bo remember? She gives up on the lock and pounds on the door. A nurse dressed in a uniform that looks like it was in style in the Civil War comes in and says, “Hush, you’ll awaken him.”

“Him?” asks Bo.

“I don’t think I can say,” says the nurse. Bo remembers she can charm people, because she immediately lays a succubus touch on the nurse to try to get more information out of her. The nurse says, “Beautiful eyes – both brown and blue. You’re the one.” Well, that’s spooky déjà vu.

The train goes all wobbly and the nurse says, “You made him angry.”

Eddie leads the way
Eddie leads the way

Eddie, who has a mysteriously appearing and disappearing umbrella, brought Hale and Dyson to a place with a lot of junk piled beside some railroad tracks. He says he must know Dyson’s true feelings for Bo to find her. First Dyson gives him a description: brown hair, 5’6″, etc. That won’t do. Dyson shows Eddie the burned card photo on his phone that Kenzi sent him. Eddie wants to know if Kenzi is his, too, just like this Bo. Hale says, “No, she’s mine.” Eddie says if Bo is the person on the card she’s in a heap of trouble.

To make the tracking work, Dyson has to give the feels. He says, “She has the most beautiful heart. And it breaks every time someone she loves is hurting. She’s brave. Stubborn. Passionate. True. She loves with all of her being. And I can’t do any of this without her.” Eddie likes that.

Hale says it’s hard to say stuff like that out loud. Dyson, says, “Hale, you gotta tell Kenzi how you feel.” Hale says it isn’t that easy, makes excuses. Dyson says no more excuses. Hale splits to go find Kenzi.

Girl talk
Girl talk

Amber/Lauren delivers a plate of liver and onions to a male customer. He says, “Thank you, darlin'” She sits down by Crystal to fold napkins and says, “I think that guy just slapped my butt with his eyes. How do you put up with some of these customers?”

“Same as I put up with some of the staff.” Getting turned down on an invite for drinks brings out the claws.

Amber/Lauren apologizes for earlier, which Crystal quickly forgives. The liver and onions guy chokes and Lauren goes into doctor mode.

restaurant surgery
restaurant surgery

Amber/Lauren slices open the guy’s throat with a table knife, asks him what kind of Fae he is to be sure she knows what she’s doing, and pulls a metal cage or something equally weird out of him. Despite the 7″ slit in his neck, he sits up and says thank you.

Amber/Lauren looks up to see that Crystal has filmed the whole thing with her phone. (Déjà vu is everywhere you look.) Crystal has visions of big money from selling this piece of alien footage somewhere. Lauren isn’t thrilled.

By the railroad tracks, Dyson and Eddie talk dimensional shifts. Dyson smells someone following them. (Clio is on a rooftop with binoculars.)

Hale shows up at the clubhouse with flowers. He’s practicing his speech to Kenzi when she comes in and tells him to hush because Tiny Tamsin is asleep. He gives her the flowers. She says, “Hale, that’s so sweet. These are gonna add that little boom, boom, pow Bo’s room needs.” She’s a heartbreaker, that Kenzi.

This is all right, right?
This is all right, right?

“I like you,” Hale blurts out. “Every time I walk into a room, you are all I can look at.” Kenzi plants a big kiss on him, pauses, wonders what she’s doing, sweeps everything off the counter and pulls Hale on top with her, pauses, says, “This is all right, right?” She grabs him again, does something with her hands in his lower regions while he is saying, “Wait, wait.” She looks at her handiwork, says, “Oh, god, I love you in purple!” and wraps her legs around him. Hale says, “Wait, it’s the perfume.” She doesn’t want to give up and waste the purple, but just then Tamsin screams.

They rush upstairs to find a teen Tamsin (Eliana Jones) with even more thick Valkyrie curls than Tiny Tamsin. Teen Tamsin is mortified by her breasts. They tell her everything will be okay and Hale attempts a Dad speech.

super bizarro
super bizarro

Teen Tamsin says she’s super bizarro. Kenzi says, “Sorry, kid. You’re growing up.”

Kudos to the casting crew. Not only did they find every pretty 20-something woman in Canada to be in the salon scenes, they also found two young actors who look very much like Rachel Skarsten to be the younger Tamsins.

Dyson finds a machine in the junk beside the railroad tracks. It looks a bit like an old radio from the days when radios had tubes and took up the whole living room wall. He thinks the thing is important but Eddie doesn’t know what it is. Dyson realizes Eddie has been asleep so long he doesn’t know what anything modern is and can’t track. Clio flies into the scene and tackles Eddie with his own umbrella. Clio rants about opening the gate to another dimension with a ticket and how it would make them all go boom. Then she fights off Dyson with the umbrella. He knocks out one of her teeth with the thing.

I'm Eddie
I’m Eddie

Clio says, “He is not Eddie. I’m Eddie,” and smacks the umbrella in the dirt for emphasis. Seems Eddie was asleep so long that she took over his gigs. Then we need some exposition about how Eddie’s spawn were elementals but they only have command of one element, whereas Clio is some sort of super elemental who has command of all four elements: earth, air, water, and fire. Finished with her exposition, Clio pushes Eddie onto the train tracks, and she knows a train is coming. He quotes 800 year old poetry as the train obliterates him leaving no trace. Clio says the next train comes at a quarter after 8 and asks if Dyson has a ticket. He says he might.

Back at the clubhouse, looking at The Wanderer card with MMXV on it. Could be 2015 or 8:15 pm. Kenzi says no one can touch the card because it bursts into flames, but Clio can because of the elemental thingy. Dyson and Clio leave with the card.

The ticket
The ticket

Clio stuffs the ticket in the strange machine. It works.

Dyson’s phone rings and it’s Lauren. She wants to come home. I hope home is the place where Bo is, and not some Fae compound ruled over by a new Ash. Dyson says it’s not safe, people are still looking for her. She tells Dyson to take care of her.

Vex is breaking into a car, on the phone promising money to – wait for it – Clio. He insists he will pay a lot if Bo is returned in one piece. Clio is talking on a plastic cylinder that appears and disappears from behind her ear without logical explanation. Do Apple and Google know about this communication device?

Train's coming
Train’s coming

Phone calls finished, Dyson and Clio go stand on the track, right where Eddie had once been. Clio says, “Shit’s about to get interesting. That’s a death train.” They disappear magically just as the train approaches.

Teen Tamsin sleeps in Bo’s bed as Kenzi sets off with a bejeweled gadget which she will use to pay for more Sparkle Plenty from Massimo. She swiped the jeweled thing from Trick, and he’s looking for it. Teen Tamsin may be grown Tamsin when she wakes up – did Kenzi think about that when she let her sleep in Bo’s perfect sex palace?

Amber/Lauren and Crystal are downing shots after work, still in the cafe. Yeah, I know Lauren said she couldn’t but that was before the video incident. Crystal leaves to pee and Lauren digs immediately for her phone. There’s a password. Crystal returns and tells her the password. Crystal says, “This is about that alien video.”

Thank you for deleting
Thank you for deleting

Lauren says, “That video can’t exist.” She explains about the bad people who will come for her and says she wishes she could tell Crystal more. Crystal deletes it. Lauren gives her a long, long, long hug. Crystal offers to delete 30 Instagrams of gas station sandwiches if hugging will happen again. Lauren says, “I’m Lauren.” Crystal says, “Nice to meet you, Lauren.”

I'm getting off this train
I’m getting off this train

Bo sucked enough chi from the nurse to be able to escape the train. (The train one hopes Dyson and Clio just boarded, but oh, well.) Bo opens the train door, looks out into the night, and leaps.

Personal Thoughts

  • Have they stopped using the word “fae” in every episode title?
  • Again, a light episode for new mommie Anna Silk, giving her time with the baby. And not making her stuff her new mommie body into Bo’s leather pants quite yet. However, this episode’s searching after Bo got us nowhere, really. She jumped off the train just as Dyson and Clio got on. Does that mean we have to spend another episode Bo-less? I’m ready for the succubus to be back at 100%.
  • Ali Liebert is so delicious. She’s the Marilyn Monroe of the 21st Century, minus all the simpering.
  • Maybe the props, especially the disappearing umbrella and the disappearing tube behind the ear that Clio used to communicate, were metaphors for the disappearing memories of Bo, who can’t remember Kenzi, and for Kenzi, who can’t seem to remember her own love life.
  • Rachel, where are you?

Recap: Lost Girl, S4, E1 In Memoriam

A truck rolls into a warehouse with Kenzi (Ksenia Solo) hanging on underneath. She creeps out and watches some dudes put a wicker basket full of something (perhaps the Una Mens) in storage. Someone catches her just as Dyson (Kris Holden-Ried)  and Hale (K.C. Collins) come to the rescue. She tries to convince the dude holding on to her as a terrorist that’s she actually Fae by putting on a little fireworks show with sparklers shooting from her hands.

Kenzi gets sparkled
Kenzi gets sparkled

She is released, Dyson and Hale walk her out. Dyson calls her Sparkie and Tinkerbell. Hale says she smells like sunflowers and chardonnay (he’s sweet on her for sure) and reminds her that her fake Fae powers are temporary.

At the clubhouse, Kenzi is wearing Bo’s kimono, talking about thongs. Dyson says the thongs sort of fill the place up, but he doesn’t mention the missing Bo, who should be filling up the place.

It’s as if Bo was never there. She’s completely out of the conversation. Kenzi claims she’s not lonely. Dyson says, “Why would you be lonely with me here?”

dyson and kenzi kissing
Dyson and Kenzi kissing. What?

Dyson deals with the sight of a beautiful woman in Bo’s kimono by launching a memory sub-routine he can’t articulate. He kisses Kenzi-the-stand-in-for-Bo. Kenzi really gets into the kissing when suddenly Dyson remembers his buddy Hale, who been carrying a torch for Kenzi since forever, and stops kissing. Crikey, mate, it isn’t like Hale was grabbing a lot of kisses from Kenzi on his own initiative. I’m all in favor of people kissing Kenzi – in fact I’d like to see Bruce give it a shot and I wouldn’t mind Kenzi getting Hale’s shirt off again (please). But kissing Dyson feels a little too much like sister sabotage, except for the little plot point that she can’t remember her sister-friend Bo even exists.

Dyson asks, “Since when are we – this?”

Aife
Aife’s lost her daughter

A knock at the door. It’s Aife (Inga Cadranel), who needs a private investigator to help her find her daughter. Her daughter named Bo. Dyson and Kenzi look at each other like who’s Bo? Kenzi says, “Kind of a dude’s name, am I right?”

Aife, Dyson and Kenzi go to a restaurant to talk private investigating. Aife reminds Dyson they’ve met before – at Taft’s lab. He remembers being at Taft’s lab and that Aife was there, but not Bo.

Kenzi is trying to wrap her head around the idea that this sexy woman has a 30 year old daughter. Aife says there’s no record of her birth but she’s pretty darn sure she has a daughter and that she would have named her after her own mother. She says she knew as soon as she found this photo that it was her daughter.

The photo of Bo
The photo of Bo

Isn’t that the photo of Bo that Dyson kept in his night stand?

Dyson looks at it and says, “This is a beautiful woman.”

Kenzi grabs it and says, “Yeah, if your into like faces and bodies, whatever.”

Aife pulls down her lower eyelid for some show and tell.

see my eye
See that?

Dyson and Kenzi peer into her eye and see a dark spot. Dyson says, “That’s a requerdo coil (or something phonetically close to that). Hard proof that a Fae has been messing with her memory.”

Aife mentions paying well, so Kenzi agrees to take the case. Dyson’s phone alarm goes off and he gets up to go to the spot where he goes every day in search of Tamsin, who somehow saved him by going all Thelma and Louise and driving her truck off a cliff with Dyson in it. Seems Tamsin hasn’t been seen for months.

Charm the waitress
Charm the waitress

The waitress brings the bill, which Aife gets out of paying by laying some succubus charm on her. Since it’s the exact same waitress that Bo pulled this trick on in episode 1, Kenzi has a moment of dissonance because she recognizes the situation even though she doesn’t remember why. Her reaction is the same as in episode 1: larceny. She wants to be Aife’s manager.

At the Dal, Kenzi and Trick (Rick Howland) are looking at some steam punk gadget that looks like a junior high science project model of the solar system. They talk about the fact that Trick thinks someone is messing with the balance of space and time. He thinks its the Una Mens. Kenzi asks if that would do memory loss. He says no, asks why she’s interested. She says she needs a bead on a local Fae who could cause amnesia. Trick goes into his Fae Rolodex and pulls out the name of Dr. Snook.

Kenzi says, “Speaking of docs, any word on Lauren?” Tamsin she remembers. Lauren she remembers. Apparently only Bo is forgettable. Trick says Lauren abandoned the light Fae. Kenzi mentions the love of Lauren’s life – Nadia – and what the Fae did to her. She says Lauren is the only human ally she has. Trick says there are people looking for her. Kenzi says, “Yeah, I’ve heard that one before, Gramps.”

Who you calling Gramps?
Who you calling Gramps?

Trick looks at her like Gramps? revealing that he doesn’t remember he’s a grandfather, even though the word trips so easily from Kenzi’s lips. She quickly corrects herself by calling him Trickster.

The memory worm
The memory snatcher

At Dr. Snook’s, the doc recognizes immediately that Kenzi and Dyson both have the recumbent coil (or whatever it is called) in their eyes. When Kenzi realizes someone has been extracting her memory her first thought is that she could be famous – a Kardashian – and not even remember it. Dyson asks who could put the memory worm in both humans and Fae. Snook says, “Someone more powerful than Snook.”

At the Dal, Trick says for a memory spell of this magnitude you have to find and shatter the requerdo compass. Trick says rumor is that Angorum (Englerum?), the collector, has the compass. Kenzi, of course, knows that this Angle Worm character is throwing a bash but he keeps all his collectibles under lock and key.

As Kenzi is leaving Trick’s lair, he makes her empty her purse of everything she’s lifted during her visit. When he sees and touches the photo of Bo, his hand shakes and he gets a sort of shock. He says, “Tell me everything you know about your client.”

We move to The Morrigan’s place, but Vex (Paul Amos) is in charge. There’s a wall sized poster of the former Morrigan (Emmanuelle Vaugier) on the wall.

Vex is large and in charge
Vex is large and in charge

Vex wants to go to the same party Kenzi was talking about and he’s obsessing about tickets. Dyson comes in. Dyson also wants to score tickets to the collector’s ball tonight. Insert joke from Vex about Dyson liking balls here. Dyson says that he needs to get back something that’s been lost and if Vex doesn’t help him, he’ll explain that Vex exaggerated the details of young Evony’s demise. Dyson can smell Evony hidden in the back and knows she isn’t really dead as Vex claims. Vex hands over 3 tickets.

Cut to the ball. Dancers, mood lights, Dyson and Hale are there waiting for their girl to arrive. She’s back at the club house worrying about her outfit. And thinking about Lauren. She calls and leaves voice mail for Lauren.

Massimo appears. Kenzi’s angry it took him so long to get there with his vial of spark extract. She wants him to make her temporarily Fae one more time. He only gives her a tiny bit because she still owes him for the first two batches.

Mossimo gets grabby
Massimo gets grabby

Massimo suggest there are other ways to pay if she’s short on cash and gets a little grabby with Kenzi. She pushes him away but begs for more sparkle power and promises his money will be coming.

At the ball, Dyson and Hale spot Kenzi. She looks stunning, which Hale appreciates completely. Dyson only complains that she’s late. Dyson says they gotta do something good to win the prize and get to meet the England Worm dude. Kenzi says she’s seduced plenty of rich guys and will show them her skill set. She drags Hale off to the dance floor.

Cleo wants Dyson to buy her a free drink
Clio wants Dyson to buy her a free drink

Who shows up hitting on Dyson but Mia Kirshner. This is no Mia Kirshner you’ve ever seen before. This Mia is a nymph named Clio. She’s bouncy, perky, smiley, and wants to mix it up with the wolf. She makes the terrible elevator speech blunder of telling him that she’s a nymph. (A nymph who can make puns using the word “faun.”) All Dyson has to hear is nymph and he flashes back to bad memories of other nymphs and too much tequila. Clio says not all nymphs are bad and laughs charmingly.

Dyson’s attention is drawn to the dance floor. Clio thinks Kenzi and Hale’s tango is more pathetic than Dyson’s small talk, but Dyson rushes to the dance floor to rescue the situation.

Love triangle tango
Love triangle tango

The trio produce an awesome tango. Kenzi-the-stand-in-for-Bo takes her love triangle to the dance floor with Dyson and Hale-the-stand-in-for-Lauren twirling her around and doing impressive lifts and tosses as they triangle tango their way to victory.

Mmm, leg.
Mmm, leg.

We’ve seen Ksenia Solo dance before whenever anyone asks where the toothpaste is located, but this is a real Dancing with the Stars production. She has moves, does Ksenia Solo. And legs. I assume you have noticed the Betty Grable legs on our favorite succubus sidekick. Those legs go everywhere a tango can take a leg and into a few spots Dyson and Hale invent on the spot. Look at those legs.

The dance ends and Kenzi is presented with the rose, which means she gets to go into the collector’s private chambers.

The Antiquities Collector
The Antiquities Collector

Kenzi calls out “Engleroom?” and who should appear but George Takei. (Incidentally, IMDB lists George Takei’s character name as “Amphisbaena.” Why everyone pronounces it like some variation of angleworm is not explained.) Turns out our collector is a gigantic snake with a gigantic lispy “s-s-s-s-s” in middle of everything he says.

Vex crashes the party
Vex crashes the party

At the ball, Vex crashes the party looking for the wolf and making dire predictions about the Una Mens. Vex’s fashion choices here run to high heeled shoes and a chest-baring shirt. Clio rushes over to Dyson and offers to show him how to get out of there for a price. He declines and Clio leaves him there to tangle with Vex on his own. Everyone runs from Vex.

Kenzi is struggling to explain to Mr. Giant Snake what her deepest desire is: The Ricardo Montalbán, The Ricky Martin, the compass thingy. Apparently he understands what she’s asking for and says, “That’s it? You’re kind of s-s-s-s-hallow.” They exchange a few fashion tips, and Mr. Giant Snake says, “I thought the little human would wish for her return.” She says, “What?” He tosses her the compass thingy.

Kenzi turns to leave. She says, “You called me human.” He says, “There was something so vulnerable about your tango.” For good measure, he says he plans to swallow her whole.

Dyson and Vex are trading insults. Vex says he knew all along memory was gone. He doesn’t want people to remember that he wasn’t always the all powerful messmer/Morrigan he is now. Hale shows up and joins in the battle by sirening Vex’s ears into submission. This frees up Dyson to rush in and save Kenzi by throwing a giant spear into the giant snake.

Outside the Dal, Trick and Aife meet. She calls him Daddy and goes to hug him.

Meanwhile Dyson and Kenzi are about to align the compass to true north. First Dyson has to tell Kenzi all the things he would say to Bo if he remembered who the hell she was. Instead he says them to Kenzi. Instead of kissing him, which is what he wants, Kenzi admits she is lonely. She says things aren’t right and her heart hurts.

They align the compass to restore everyone’s memory, and all the following things happen at the same time.

Aife pulls out a knife to kill Trick.

Kenzi, Hale, Dyson and Vex all remember Bo and say they are going to find her. Plus they want to find out who did the memory trick to them. Hale wants to talk to Kenzi but she says, “Until she’s back I can’t even breathe.”

The slimy thing in the wicker basket that we saw at the start of the episode starts showing signs of life.

Lauren

The memory bug really got Lauren (Zoie Palmer). Poor Lauren forgot everything – not just Bo. We find her waiting tables wearing the name tag Amber. Not Lauren, not Karen. Nope. The name she uses now is Amber. Since she’s waiting tables, we can assume she also doesn’t remember she’s a brilliant scientist who can toss out words like “sodium chloride” and remembers how to pronounce “formaldehyde” even when she’s in bed with a naked succubus. Lauren also forgot what color her hair is and how to apply makeup. She falls into a chair in amazement and says, “Bo. I remember.” Let’s hope she also remembers the way to the clubhouse and how to restore her hair to its former state.

Bo wakes up
Bo wakes up

Finally we see Bo, who apparently has been making like Sleeping Beauty. She opens her eyes and we see the familiar blue of succubus lust in her eyes.

But where is Tamsin?

Personal Thoughts

  • This was a great way to deal with the problem of the star needing a little more maternity leave time. It was surprising and fun and twisted in interesting ways.
  • It gave Ksenia Solo a chance to be the star while doing the tango. She handled both responsibilities admirably.
  • The episode sets up the Una Mens as the looming evil for future episodes.
  • I like wondering where Tamsin is. A little more suspense never hurt anyone.
  • I like wondering why Lauren didn’t remember the most basic things about her identity as a scientist.
  • I’m getting really tired of wondering who the Wanderer is. Tell us, already.

The L Word Opening Credits (Season Six)

The idea is that you can get everything you need to know about an episode of The L Word from just the opening credits. If you know who was in an episode, you can remember what happened, right? Well, that’s my contention and I’m here to bring you the recap of final season of The L Word using nothing but the opening credits. Continue reading “The L Word Opening Credits (Season Six)”

New TV season shows I can’t wait to see

The summer shows are fun and I love quite a few of them, but I’m eager for the new seasons of some old favorites. Here’s what I’m looking forward to. What about you?

Lost Girl

Season 4 can’t get here soon enough for me. It airs first in Canada on Showcase beginning in November. Then there’s an agonizing wait for the U.S. showings on SyFy. At the end of season 3, Bo was off somewhere unknown meeting her father – maybe. Dyson and Tamsin disappeared in a puff of black smoke when their truck went over a cliff. Lauren was in a science lab creating Fae from humans and nobody knew where she went after everyone else escaped. Kenzi was driving a hot car with Bruce beside her. Trick had gone to Scotland with his lady love. And where the heck was Hale? Obviously the beginning of season 4 requires explaining where everyone has been and how they all get back together.

Guest stars that have been mentioned for season 4 include George Takei (from Star Trek), Mia Kirshner (from The L Word), and Ali Liebert (from Bomb Girls). If the guest stars are any indication, things should be fun on Lost Girl.

Here’s a bit of a teaser for season 4. Lost Girl season 4 is currently filming in Toronto.

House of Cards

House of Cards was Netflix first attempt at original programming and it was superb! (I can’t wait for season 2 of Netflix’s other great series, Orange is the New Black, either.) House of Cards won’t show up until sometime in the spring of 2014, but it is definitely worth the wait if it maintains the quality it had in season 1.

This political drama felt completely real. Or if not real, at least valid and true. Stars Kevin Spacey, Robin Wright, and Kate Mara were especially good, but the cast was large and there were many compelling performances.

Netflix released this trailer for season 2, which is currently filming in the Baltimore area.

Nashville

Nashville season 2 begins in September 25 on ABC, less than a month away. I love anything with singing (Glee, Smash, Nashville – I’ll watch ’em all.) People we don’t normally think of as musicians are leading the cast of this show and doing a really fine job as Nashville singing stars: Connie Britton, Hayden Panettiere, and Charles Esten in particular. Clare Bowen is my favorite in terms of singing. She plays Scarlett, a folky type who reminds me of Emmy Lou Harris.

A theme of the show has been the conflict between young and old country music, personified by Hayden Panettiere and Connie Britton. They get forced together in ways they don’t want and are very different. Both have confused personal lives and troubled love lives. A troubled love life leads to the finale of season 1, which was a disastrous car wreck.

I don’t know if you were a fan of Friday Night Lights (if you weren’t, you should have been) but there is just something completely wonderful about Connie Britton. She’s fabulous. I’m so glad we get to see her in another great series – with SINGING.

Here’s a teaser for season 2.

Grey’s Anatomy

Season 10. Can you believe it? We’ve been watching Grey’s Anatomy since Shonda Rhimes only had one show on TV. They announced recently that Sandra Oh is leaving the show. What will Meredith do without her person?

The new season begins in September with a 2 part opening episode. At the end of season 9, Arizona and Callie were in danger of breaking up, Richard was possibly electrocuted, Meredith was pregnant – the usual Grey’s drama. Over the years Grey’s has had its wins and losses, people have come and gone, story lines have succeeded and failed. But it’s always been engaging and I keep going back.

I couldn’t find an actual preview video for season 10, but three of the cast members do talk about season 10 in this video.

The Good Wife

I say that I want to see the new season of The Good Wife with some trepidation. Season 4 wasn’t good. They lost their way a bit. There were fabulous guest stars, but those guest stars got too much of the screen time, there were too many court room scenes, Kalinda’s (Archie Panjabi) story was just dropped, and Alicia (Julianna Margulies) can’t figure out what the holy hell she’s doing. I think Alicia is fascinating in her own guarded and self-contained way. However, the queen of self-contained and guarded is Kalinda. She is the most interesting character in The Good Wife. If we don’t see more of her in season 5, I think it’s going to be the end for me and The Good Wife.

When season 4 ended, Alicia was leaving Lockhart Gardner to start a new firm with Cary. That will add some drama to the relationships we already have going on the show. We don’t know where Kalinda will end up – I sincerely hope it’s with Alicia and Cary, but there haven’t been any clues.

The new season starts in September. Here’s a teaser. It seems to acknowledge that the show went off the rails a bit in season 4 with its claims to be back.

Scandal

Scandal, like House of Cards, has a ring of truth about politics and Washington that makes it fascinating. This Shonda Rhimes series begins in September with season 3.

I could talk about Kerry Washington and Tony Goldwyn and the other excellent cast members. They deserve the attention. Instead, I want to make a big fuss over Guillermo Díaz.

Guillermo Díaz has been around a while. You may remember him from Mercy or Weeds. There are currently 78 titles on his filmography page at IMDB, so I know you’ve seen him before in more than one thing. But the job he’s doing as Huck on Scandal is phenomenally outstanding. He should have had an Emmy nomination for best supporting actor, but he didn’t get one. As a defender of justice I’m here to announce that Guillermo Díaz is doing amazing work on Scandal and he should get a million awards for acting.

Now that I’m finished with my Guillermo Díaz rant, I can get back to the bigger picture on Scandal, which is the steely and powerful Olivia Pope and her Machiavellian schemes to control situations for people in Washington who screw up, including the President. I can’t wait to see what’s going to happen next.

This promo video is more about Kerry Washington’s Emmy nom than season 3, but it’s the only thing available right now.

I haven’t even mentioned The Walking Dead or How I Met Your Mother, which is on its last season, or Elementary, or Castle or a whole lot of other good shows. Which of your favorites are you most eager to see?

Guillermo Diaz image from The Jasmine Brand.

The L Word Opening Credits (Season Five)

Recapping season 5 of The L Word using nothing to tell the story but the opening credits. That’s what’s happening right here. Continue reading “The L Word Opening Credits (Season Five)”

The L Word Opening Credits (Season Four)

This is part four of a series of posts that recap The L Word based solely on what you learn by watching the opening credits. We are ready to take on Season 4. Continue reading “The L Word Opening Credits (Season Four)”